Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Nail Polish!

Getting your nails done is one of the really cool things girls and gay guys get to do that guys can't, and it's sad. It is so much fun to have a nice lady massage your hands with lotion and ask about your day and recommend the best bbq places in KTown (not racist, Danny, because this ACTUALLY HAPPENED TO ME.)

But I can't even keep up with nail polish trends.

Should they be sheer and pink? Pearly white? Pitch black?

After years of getting manicures I realized two things: 1) you NEVER need to be paying more than 10 bucks for a manicure, no matter what, and 2) you only ever need these five colors.

I keep them all stashed in the bottom of my huge purse and break them out when I get manicures. I've learned it's good to buy your own polishes and bring them with you. You can't always trust the polish at salons. The brands can be cheap and then your nails with chip, or they water them down with alcohol. Everyone looks good in these colors; blondes, Asians, Indians, black girls (I have a super diverse group of girlfriends) and I promise you will have a dope polish NO MATTER WHAT SEASON IT IS FOR THE REST OF TIME.

For dark, plum vamp-y first date nails: Chanel "Madness"
For happy pure red (that isn't too tranny, as bright reds can be): OPI "I'm Not Realy a Waitress"
For rich, brown "I'm a sexy professional lady thank you very much" nails: Essie "Chocolate Brown Truffle"
For whimsical, flirty, summertime light blue toes: Hard Candy "Sky"
For "I will never get a regular manicure, I need something that won't show when it chips, I don't want to be adventurous, but I want to look presentable": OPI "Mademoiselle"

For a line of nail polish that is pretty much unbeatable, try Lippman. Their pallette is fantastic, and includes the amazing "Nefertiti", a sparkly gold lacquer tha makes anyone look like Cleopatra (but not the goddess Nefertiti. Weird, huh?).

For: Girls, girls, girls!!

Price: $7-$15 (Chanel, Hard Candy and Nars will run you up higher, but the colors are completely worth it, and you will not find them in most nail salons. OPI and Essie you will find in most places!)


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